Episodes
Wednesday Jul 06, 2016
How To Stop Suffering Right Now
Wednesday Jul 06, 2016
Wednesday Jul 06, 2016
Work with me www.JairekRobbins.com
Pain is something that happens momentarily. You might be walking down the street, near a baseball game and all of a sudden you hear a huge roar of the crowd. You look over just to see the home run ball come flying over and WHAP! It hit you in the arm and you go “OOUCCCHH!!!!” That “black and blue” welt that is about to occur in your arm is PAIN.
If three months later you are still walking around saying, “because that baseball hit me in the arm that’s why I don’t have the love of my life/ that’s the pain that caused me to lose my job..” Unless you are a fine art creator that you can’t move your arm or something – you now allow suffering to occur.
SUFFERING is what you mentally and emotionally attach to an event that allows a moment of pain to prolong into the future.
For you to prolong or let it to keep hurting for a week, a month or even the entire day that’s the meaning you’ve associated with the situation that you are allowing to repeat itself again and again and again. Let’s say you have a bad day and you lose out on a deal, lose out a couple of customers and you get fight at home with your significant other.
Then someone says “How are you doing?”
You say, “HORRIBLE!”
“Why?”
“Everything in my life is a disaster right now!”
“Really? Can’t you at least say something that is something good with your life right now?”
“NO!”
Let’s pause right here and look at the exaggeration of language. What’s going wrong in your life? EVERYTHING IS A DISASTER! Really? Stop in this moment and challenge that thought..
Every little thing is a disaster?
Can you still see? YES
Can you still breathe? YES
Do you live in a free place where you have the option of choices in your life? YES
Do you have the ability to educate yourself online with the internet or with books at the library? YES
So..everything in your life is horrible or are you over exaggerating?
There’s a lady named Byron Katie who created something like THE WORK where she has a few questions. If you have a belief that says everything in my life is screwed up – challenge it! Challenge it by saying:
- Is that true?
- Is it true all the time everyone no matter what that everything in your life is screwed up?
- Who are you when you believe that to be true? Are you the best, most passionate, determined, focus and resilient version of yourself? Or are you a frustrated, sad or wimpy beat up version of yourself?
- Who would you be without this thought?
Now the final step, turn it around. Find a reciprocal. Maybe it’s a simple – not everything in my life is screwed up right now. You can reverse it however you like but always when you release yourself from that thought and turn it around and find a reciprocal. Use it as a replacement thought.
Automatic positive thoughts come to consistently reframing and reconditioning your mind to focus on what’s great in your life instead of what’s wrong with your life. It releases the over exaggeration of negativity and the under exaggeration of positivity. It gives you a more resilient mindset. It’s not creating a false reality but it’s retraining yourself to focus on the good stuff first and once you feel resilient, confident and painless then you take on the hard stuff.
There’s a book called The Tools and in this book the authors recommend that their psychologists and therapists recommend taking pain and normally what happens is that there’s a cloud of pain right in front of you.
What they say is use the pain meaning look at the painful events that is standing between you and the outcome you want, walk towards it and start chanting in your head – I love pain! Charge right into it and what happens is the cloud soaks you in and your part of it and poof! It spits you out the other side and now you’re at the freedom you always dreamed of.